Man ‘Secretly Outbidding’ In-Laws for House on His Family’s Block Praised

The internet has rallied behind a man who secretly outbid his parents-in-law on a home on his block.

The original poster (@OkMine9845) detailed how his wife had a difficult relationship with her parents, who live between California and his wife’s hometown. His mother-in-law retired and they decided to sell their home and buy a house near the daughter. A few weeks ago, they put a bid in on a house two doors down from their family.

“Their sense of entitlement extends to real estate and they put in a low bid full of conditions. Still, my wife was very worried. She does not want them as neighbors. Neither do I, nor do I want to see a rare modest home in our area go to a part-time resident, when housing is scarce here,” the OP wrote in the subreddit AITAH [Am I the A*****], where it garnered 7,900 upvotes.

The husband formed a limited liability company and bid the full asking price with the plan to rent it out, using an agency to manage it. He did not tell his wife.

“I did not want to put her in a position where she would have to lie to her parents or reveal what would be taken as a very provocative action.

“The in-laws raged against the ‘mystery person who gazumped [outbid] them,’ the seller, the realtor. I just nodded sympathetically.

“I’ve told no one but my brother. He told me it was a AH move. That surprised me, so I am wondering what outside observers think of what I did,” he wrote.

Expert Insight

Seth Eisenberg, president and CEO of the Practical Application of Intimate Relationship Skills Foundation, weighed in on the situation with Newsweek.

“Ethically, this is a gray area. If the OP and his wife had a mutual agreement that they did not want to live near her parents, then he was honoring that. However, if the in-laws had a strong emotional or practical attachment to the property and he actively and secretly interfered, it could be seen as manipulative. Open communication would have been a healthier approach,” he said.

He explained that while the OP may have had good intentions, secrecy in major decisions can erode trust.

If the OP and his wife had agreed they didn’t want her parents nearby, his actions aligned with that.

He detailed secrets often surface and create bigger problems later. Eisenberg suggests the OP have an honest conversation with his wife before she finds out from someone else.

Reddit Reacts

Redditors had mixed reactions, though many sided with the OP.

“NTA [Not the A******]—It was a smart move tbh. It’s better to stay away from toxic people. Your in-laws would probably be constantly in your wife’s face, criticizing her or saying mean things, and it will definitely affect her mental health tbh,” said one person.

“NTA. You shielded your wife from an inevitable boundary invasion without putting her in the awkward position of confrontation. Let them rage about the “mystery buyer” while you enjoy your peaceful neighborhood,” said another user.

“Not only are you not an AH, you are a real-life hero! I salute you,” said another Reddit user.

Newsweek has reached out to u/OkMine9845 for comment via Reddit. We could not verify the details of the case.

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