Late-Night Talk Shows Distraught Over Donald Trump Win

America’s late-night talk show hosts have weighed in on Donald Trump’s presidential election victory over Kamala Harris—and none appear too thrilled at the prospect of him returning to the White House.

Hours after polls closed across the U.S. on Tuesday night, Republican Trump was declared the winner following a hotly-contested race that saw Harris step in just months ahead of Election Day after President Joe Biden stepped down.

Addressing supporters from Florida as the results showed they were in his favor, Trump said: “This was a movement like nobody’s ever seen before, and frankly, this was, I believe, the greatest political movement of all time. There’s never been anything like this in this country and maybe beyond, and now it’s going to reach a new level of importance because we’re going to help our country heal.”

Trump touted a “political victory that our country has never seen before” and promised the “golden age” of the United States. He described his voter group as “the most unified coalition,” citing his gains among Black and Hispanic voters.

As Trump prepares for a second term in the White House, a slew of celebrities have taken to social media to share their views on the result, with some celebrating and many others commiserating.

Jimmy Kimmel, Stephen Colbert, and Seth Meyers expressed their very clear distaste for Trump’s victory as they returned to their respective shows on Wednesday, with the president-elect branded a “bad person.”

Newsweek has contacted a representative of Trump via email for comment.

For anybody who tunes into these shows, the comedians’ takes will come as no surprise, as each had previously criticized the former star of The Apprentice.

Newsweek has rounded up the TV personalities’ reactions to the election result. Note: Some of the videos contain profanity.

Jimmy Kimmel

Kimmel started Wednesday night’s installment of Jimmy Kimmel Live! joking to sidekick Guillermo Rodriguez that he was packing up to leave the U.S.

“I can’t stay for another four years of this. Who knows what he’s going to do,” Kimmel said. “You’ve heard [Trump]. He said he has a list of enemies. You think I’m not on that list?”

During his subsequent opening monologue, Kimmel further discussion the result, telling the audience that Election Day was “the worst Taco Tuesday of my whole life.”

“We had the choice between a prosecutor and a criminal, and we chose the criminal to be president of the United States,” Kimmel quipped. “More than half of this country voted for the criminal who’s planning to pardon himself for his crimes.”

“I guess this election wasn’t rigged,” Kimmel continued. “That’s weird, though, right? I mean, he said it would be rigged. He said it was being rigged while people were in line voting. Isn’t it remarkable that this time, the fix wasn’t in? Last time, the Democrats cheated. This time, we chose not to, I guess.”

“Donald Trump is like the Emperor from Star Wars,” Kimmel added. “He’s old, he’s evil, and he keeps coming back with no reasonable explanation whatsoever.”

Later, Kimmel became emotional as he said: “Let’s be honest, it was a terrible night for women, for children, for the hundreds of thousands of hardworking immigrants who make this country go, for healthcare, for our climate, for science, for journalism, for justice, for free speech.

“It was a terrible night for poor people, for the middle class, for seniors who rely on Social Security, for our allies in Ukraine, for NATO, for the truth, and democracy and decency.

“And it was a terrible night for everyone who voted against him. And guess what? It was a bad night for everyone who voted for him, too—you just don’t realize it yet.”

Stephen Colbert

Opening Wednesday’s The Late Show with Stephen Colbert, the titular host somberly greeted viewers as he said: “Hey there. How are you doing? If you watch the show regularly, I’m guessing you’re not doing great. Yeah, me neither.

“You know, today, people said to me, ‘Sorry, you have to do a show tonight,’ which is nice of them to say, but I don’t have to do a show. I get to do a show tonight.”

Stephen Colbert then expressed gratitude for his staffers, the studio audience at New York City’s Ed Sullivan Theater, and the viewers at home, “because—especially at times like this—what do we most want to be? Not alone. So thanks for being here.”

In his follow-up monologue, Colbert returned to his promised comedy, exclaiming: “Well, f***! It happened. Again. After a bizarre and vicious campaign fueled by a desperate need not to go to jail, Donald Trump has won the 2024 election.

“The deep shock and sense of loss is enormous. But let’s look at the bright side. This way, at least there’ll be a peaceful transfer of power.”

“All day yesterday, I was walking around proudly wearing my ‘I Voted’ sticker,” he continued. “Today, I wore my ‘I am questioning my fundamental belief in the good of humanity’ sticker.”

“Now, as a late night host, people often say to me, ‘Come on, part of you has got to want Trump to win because he gives you so much material to work with,'” he went on. “No. No. No one tells the guy who cleans the bathroom ‘Wow, you must love it when someone has explosive diarrhea. There’s so much material for you to work with!'”

Seth Meyers

“So I just want to start tonight by admitting something I feel you all should know: I voted for Kamala Harris,” Seth Meyers announced as he opened Wednesday’s edition of Late Night with Seth Meyers.

He went on: “I was watching the results come in because I couldn’t sleep, and it was like Christmas Eve—if you know, on Christmas morning, you’re either gonna wake up to find that Santa left presents under the tree or just took a huge dump in your fireplace.

“So I was watching results, and I knew I would be here at a few hours later, you know, and talk about it,” he continued. “And I couldn’t help but think—and this is genuine—what a privilege. What a privilege to be here with you, to be here with my colleagues, to not feel alone, what a privilege.

“This is a joyful place to work, and we hope you can see the joy when you’re watching at home. We’re not going to let anything take that joy away, even when we’re talking about things that are not particularly joyful.”

“For example, here’s something—I don’t think Donald Trump’s a good person,” Meyers said of the president-elect. “I’d even go so far as to say he’s a bad person.

“Now, in my defense, I’m only basing that on everything I’ve ever been taught about what makes someone good or bad. That’s it.

“But, you know, and this is real, and this is something I accept, half the country thinks he’s a good person, or they don’t care that he’s not, because they think he’s a good president, and because of that, he’s going to be a president again. That’s how democracy works in America, a country that is a privilege to live in, even on a morning like today, also such a privilege.

“Look, I don’t know who the late-night staff voted for,” he added. ” But I do know everyone who works on this show agrees on our mission, which is to find laughter, to find connection, and to find joy—even when things are bleak—and to tell you how we feel. And look, it might be challenging, but to that challenge, I say, ‘Let’s f****** go.'”

Jimmy Fallon

Unlike his fellow late-night talk show hosts, Jimmy Fallon opted to keep things notably lighthearted as he addressed his audience on Wednesday.

“Well, guys last night, America decided to get back with the crazy ex and elect Donald Trump as the 47th president of the United States,” the comedian said on opening The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon.

“No matter who you voted for, I think all Americans can agree it’s going to be a rough Thanksgiving. Yep, Trump returning to the White House is a huge, historic comeback for someone who literally never went away.

“Of course, Trump’s already super busy. First, he’s got to move all those classified documents back into the White House. Republicans were thrilled about last night until they realize it’s going to be four more years of Melania’s [Trump] Christmas decorations.”

“It was a tough night for Democrats,” Fallon continued. “Today, they turned to Elon Musk, like, ‘So tell me more about living on Mars. How close are we?’ The election wasn’t really close. It was a big night for Donald Trump and a bigger night for Don Julio [tequila]. That’s right, 51 percent of the country is really happy, 47 percent are really hungover.”

He went on: “Trump won last night in pretty convincing fashion, securing the Electoral College and the popular vote, which means for the first time ever, he’ll accept the results of an election.

“Yep, so far, the Electoral College votes are 224 for Kamala Harris and 292 for Trump. Yep, 224 versus 292 is basically Trump’s made-up weight versus his actual weight.”

“Trump made history in a lot of ways,” Fallon added. “Last night, he became the first convicted felon ever elected president. Uh, congrats? Trump could be the first president to be under White House arrest.”