A mom of two boys from Perth, Australia, who tried for a girl wasn’t prepared for the unexpected twist in her family plans.
Cai Nelson-Davies (@cainelsond) shared a post on TikTok: the first slide of her two sons Tatum, 7, and Alfie, 5. The text overlay read: “Already has 2 boys. Tries 1 more time for a girl.”
In the next frame is a picture of Nelson-Davies’ partner, 28-year-old Corey Browne, surrounded by their four sons, including their newest additions—identical twin boys.
Cai told Newsweek that she had wanted a daughter for as long as she could remember, but when she attended her 12-week scan, she was shocked to learn her growing family was about to get even bigger than expected.
“I was told at my first scan at five weeks it was only a singleton,” Cai said. “[I] was only informed on my second scan at 12 weeks that I was carrying twins, so it was very crazy to hear.”
Initially, Cai shared that she felt a mixture of emotions after discovering the twins were both boys.
“When I [found] out it was twins, I thought at least we had a double chance of one being a girl,” she said. “But then we were told identical, so I knew if we were told twin A was a boy, then twin B would also be a boy. It was very obvious at that second scan they were boys; I remember feeling devastated and [having] a few cries.”
Claire Law is a teacher and relational psychotherapist who specializes in guiding people through complex interpersonal dynamics, fostering understanding and growth in their relationships. She previously told Newsweek that gender disappointment is rarely discussed.
“A mother who wanted a daughter but had two boys instead isn’t just reacting to the gender itself—she’s grieving an idea,” Law said. “She likely saw herself raising a daughter, imagined what that bond would look like [and] built expectations around it.”
Law said that it can feel embarrassing for parents to admit they had hoped for something else, especially when the common parenting narrative says you should simply be thankful.
“The reality is, parenting is complex,” Law said. “A mother who acknowledges the disappointment, sits with it, and allows herself to adapt is far more likely to bond fully with her children than someone who feels guilty for even having those emotions.”
Most parents come to see that connection comes from shared experiences and being present, not from gender or expectations, Law added.
After the initial shock, Cai’s perspective shifted. “After a while, it was also exciting, as identical twins are a blessing,” she said.
Now, life for the mom of four boys, including 3-year-old twins Tommy and Luka, is anything but quiet. “Life is crazy,” Cai said. “[It’s] loud, chaotic, challenging, lots of fighting lots of superheroes, lots of dinosaurs, but also lots of cuddles and love.”
