A mom of three has shared powerful footage of the moment her autistic daughter covered her younger brother’s ears.
Bekah Cook, from County Durham in the U.K., shared a video to her Instagram, @bekahzneurolife, of her 3-year-old Zali moving to protect her 9-month-old younger sibling Ziggy.
Cook was on her way to a local thrift store with the two young children, when Zali suddenly leaned over the buggy carrying her brother. “The sound of traffic was loud, and I suspected it might be a sensory trigger,” Cook told Newsweek. “Without prompting, Zali gently placed her hands over Ziggy’s ears and said, ‘It’s too loud, the noise.’”
Cook said there was something “powerful” about Zali’s response at that moment. “Instead of focusing on her own discomfort, Zali instinctively sought to protect her baby brother,” she said. They left soon after, but Cook returned to the moment on social media, posting the clip to her Instagram alongside a caption stating: “In shielding him, she showed me something beautiful—that her sensitivity isn’t just a struggle, it’s a gift.”
Cook said Zali exhibits all the “traits and challenges” consistent with autism. “In public, especially around unfamiliar adults or in new environments, Zali often becomes non-verbal, which is a fear-based response,” she said. “Zali is also extremely noise-sensitive. Many people have suggested ear defenders, but, unfortunately, wearing headphones is a sensory trigger in itself. She’s hypersensitive to textures—she wears the same T-shirt and leggings every day because they’re the only fabrics she can tolerate.”
Cook added that Zali also struggles with Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA). It is a profile of autism in which an individual struggles to meet everyday demands and requests. This is something often caused by heightened anxiety and means simple things such as asking Zali to put on her headphones can trigger a threat response.
A big part of the reason why Cook is able to identify these traits in Zali is because she exhibits them herself. “I’m neurodivergent, diagnosed with autism, PDA profile, and dyslexia, and I also live with several physical disabilities including fibromyalgia, osteoarthritis and hypermotility syndrome,” Cook said.
She began documenting the challenges of being a mom when it was decided that her eldest son, Ezra, 6, who was struggling at the time, would better off being homeschooled. “I initially started vlogging as a form of therapy, a way to process life and track changes,” Cook said. “Over time, I realized that what I was sharing offered valuable insight for others, too.”
It has afforded Cook the opportunity to capture moments like the one she saw between her kids that day. “Zali and Ziggy share a unique relationship,” Cook said. “Even at just 3 years old, Zali can read Ziggy’s body language with remarkable accuracy. She’ll sing his favorite song or give him his dummy when he’s upset—all without being asked.”
Cook said she believes there is a common misconception that autistic individuals lack empathy. “That couldn’t be further from the truth,” the mom added. “Zali’s deep emotional connection and instinct to protect Ziggy is one of the most-beautiful displays of empathy I’ve ever witnessed.”
Seeing Zali move to protect her brother in this way stirred a mixture of emotions for Cook, though. On the one hand, the mom felt “awe” at seeing her 3-year-old show such consideration for her baby brother, but, on the other, there was a “sadness” at realizing this was Zali’s reality now. “I know from personal experience how painful noise can be and how vulnerable it can make you feel,” Cook said. She also felt “worry” that, at such a tender age, Zali felt she needed to protect her brother.
Zali’s reality is one a significant number of children will face. The CDC previously reported that around 1 in every 31 children aged 8 had some form of ASD.
Cook said she hopes her video raises awareness of the sensory issues those with autism face and reminds others that it is often “invisible.” “It’s crucial to spot the small things,” she added. “Growing up, I often felt judged based on preconceived ideas about how autistic people ‘should’ act. I remember a consultant in a rheumatology appointment once saying, ‘Well, you don’t look autistic.’”
“Parents are the experts in their children,” Cook said. “Trust your gut.”
