A mother’s account of being told not to feed her baby at a café has stirred a wave of reactions among viewers online, raising questions about the limits of restaurant rules and the realities of parenting in public.
Ally Nelson, a 33-year-old podcast host from Toronto, Canada, currently on maternity leave, shared the now-viral experience in a TikTok video posted on October 19. The video, which has been viewed more than 192,000 times and liked by over 9,000 users, shows Nelson asking viewers: “I need you to tell me if I am in the wrong or if the cafe is in the wrong.”
She recounted visiting a café with her 1-year-old son to meet a friend, bringing a few small items of food for her toddler—a “sippy cup” of milk, sugar-free Cheerios, a fruit and vegetable pouch, and a bit of naan bread with hummus in a ziplock bag. But before she could finish feeding him, a staff member informed her that no outside food was allowed, even for young children. Nelson added: “I just feel like that’s anti-motherhood.”
“The cafe really only had cookies, brownies, and pastries that I did not feel were suitable for a baby anyways,” Nelson told Newsweek. “I asked TikTok viewers if I was in the wrong or if the cafe was in the wrong for telling me I needed to put away my outside food that I was feeding my son.”
The short video launched a discussion in the comments, with most viewers siding with Nelson and criticizing the café’s approach as overly strict.
“What about formula fed babies? They going to tell the moms sorry you got to give your kid a chai latte instead of formula?” one viewer said, while another added: “I would say can you show me your baby food menu then.”
“The cafe is definitely in the wrong,” a third viewer shared. “You did nothing wrong.”
“Almost guaranteed that person has no kids.” one viewer commented. “You are NOT in the wrong. Even airlines let you bring anything alone for toddlers and babies, including water …”
Nelson, who hosts the Untrivial podcast, said she had never encountered such a reaction before when bringing food for her baby to restaurants.
“I personally felt like baby food shouldn’t count as ‘outside food’,” she said, adding that she was still a paying customer and did not believe the café’s policy was related to allergy risks, since the café offered items containing nuts.
“I understand that the cafe is a private establishment and they can make whatever rules they want,” Nelson said. “I just didn’t think baby food was crossing the line.”
While a few commenters accused Nelson of exhibiting “entitled mother” behavior, she pushed back on that characterization.
“I’d argue that expecting a small cafe to have foods that are appropriate for a 1-year-old baby is more entitled than bringing something with me,” she said.
Nelson added that she did not name the business in her video and has no intention of doing so.
“I don’t want a lot of angry people targeting a small business on my behalf—especially in this economy,” she said. “I will just take my business elsewhere.”
The response to the clip, Nelson said, underscored broader frustrations that many other new mothers feel when navigating public spaces.
“To me, it brought up the fact that motherhood in today’s culture is quite lonely, and we are desperate for third spaces and community,” Nelson said. “When we are told our baby’s needs are problematic in those third spaces, it makes us feel even more isolated.”
Despite the backlash from a minority of viewers, Nelson said she appreciated the support from others who understood her perspective.
“The people who think I broke the rules have a point,” she said, “but, at the end of the day, I just hope mothers can be afforded a bit more grace when they’re just trying to feed a hungry baby and leave the house for once.”
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