The Tyranny of the Early Riser

Let me tell you about my buddies Jules and Jim. Jules awakes with the roosters, concludes cross-fit by 6:30 a.m. and leaps to his eight-hour workday at 7:30 a.m. sharp. Jim stumbles to the shower by 10 a.m., is still clearing cobwebs at 11 a.m., and at noon begins a workday that might take him well past midnight. Which of the two is widely deemed the more industrious?

I think every reader knows that by and large, it’s Jules. Few will factor in Jim’s longer hours, and some will consider him bizarre. The assumption that mornings equal industry is so widespread that it can only be the result of an international conspiracy: the Tyranny of the Early Riser.

In its quest for world domination, the Tyranny deploys jackhammer agitprop in the form of cliches drummed into our skulls from birth. “The early bird gets the worm.” “Early to bed and early to rise keeps a man healthy, wealthy and wise.” Culture and tradition, ancient and new, brim with the Tyranny’s propaganda.

In The Iliad by Homer, the early morning was the only time Odysseus and his men held their ground in the battle against the Trojans. Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice subtly favors characters who rise early, such as Mr. Darcy, who enjoy the tranquility of the morning hours for reflection and walks.

The modern song “Morning Has Broken” celebrates the beauty and promise of a new day. “Here Comes the Sun” by The Beatles expresses joy and optimism as the morning sun rises, symbolizing hope and positivity. In the film Rocky, the titular character’s preposterously early morning (and odd liquid-egg breakfasts) are key to his success.

Philosophy’s Stoics, such as Epictetus, emphasized the importance of starting the day with purpose and intention, advocating for early rising as a way to cultivate self-discipline and resilience.

As for religion, well, sometimes this seems like the cult of the matutinal is the only thing Jews and Muslims can agree on—both insist on prayer at the ungodliest of hours. Christianity, more forgiving than either, nonetheless gets in on the act: Mark 1:35 seems to delight in emphasizing that Jesus was up to pray “very early in the morning, while it was still dark.” Of course, inevitably, the eastern philosophies like Taoism and Buddhism promote the early morning hours as a sacred time for meditation and self-reflection.

It is as if everyone from Krishna to Cat Stevens is in the pay and pocket of a secret priesthood—the Tyranny of the Early Riser.

And it has worked!

After all, look into your heart: Is it not true that you think people who hate getting up in the morning are lazy, even if they’ve been reading “War and Peace” till 4 a.m.? You mock them as semi-retired—and if they are even able to find work, they endure scowls, scoffs and sneers for being surly at the accursed 9 a.m. morning meeting.

Fine—I’ll admit it. This systemic historical injustice is not solely because of the conspiracy I have discovered. It is said that over time societal norms, religious practices, and the demands of various occupations have shaped people’s daily routines. Early rising became a cultural norm in many societies due to practical considerations related to agricultural (and, later, industrial) lifestyles. Farmers needed to make the most of daylight hours for their work. So, the idea of early rising being virtuous or productive became ingrained in many cultures.

Yet it is simply unfair. The world has early birds and night owls—Juleses and Jims, if you will—and neither can control their tendency. Like sexual orientation, it is not a choice. Yet from Korea to California, humans have a bias favoring morning people.

So, I’m here to represent the Jims of the world. I will never initiate an 8 a.m. encounter, and the best (and perhaps only) way to offend me is to schedule a working breakfast. Somewhere around 11 a.m. is when I’ll take a call. But on the other hand, I am available pretty much 16 hours a day and I’ve been known to work at 3 a.m. Call me lazy and we’re going to have words. Call me unproductive, and history will prove you wrong.

Yet when I say I am offended by a power breakfast, most people will disrespect it. When morning people say they’d rather not take a 10 p.m. call, that’s work-life balance.

In an egalitarian society, all individuals should have an equal opportunity to thrive without discrimination based on biological inclinations like chronotype. Pressure to conform to circadian rhythms that are not natural to some creates an environment in which night people are disadvantaged and may suffer stress, sleep deprivation, and reduced well-being.

So, I would like to appeal to Diversity, Equity and Inclusion programs across the land to recognize night people like Jim and me as a protected group. A group whose identity is as unchosen as is race. A group whose oppression on the basis of that identity would equally be foul. A group that deserves not just respect but representation.

Employers should adopt flexible work hours that accommodate both morning and night people. Such flexibility can enhance overall productivity by allowing individuals to work during their peak hours, ultimately benefiting both employees and employers.

That’s because beyond fairness, I believe their productivity assumptions are wrong. There’s no doubt that some excel in the early hours and others later in the day. Night people tend to be more creative and alert during evening hours, which can translate into higher productivity. I have written two books that you will find and should definitely purchase on Amazon; not a word of either was written before midnight.

I sense there is a bit of pushback at last. In recent weeks I was delighted to read an article in the sometimes-contrarian Wall Street Journal entitled “Is it ever OK to have an 8 a.m. meeting?” The piece explored the reasons to be wary of the scourge, and that is certainly progress, but it refrained from taking a strong position. We can do better.

I ask everyone to join me in daring to imagine a world where your worth is measured not by the hour of your waking but the content of your character! In such an ideal society, everyone would have an equal shot, regardless of their prospective hour of awakening. The Tyranny of the Early Riser has for too long trampled on this ideal.

That’s why I am writing this on behalf of all the Jims out there, struggling to get up and to go about their day. And my timing is no coincidence. I am marking World SleepDay, which falls this week on March 15. Organized by theWorld Sleep Society, it aims to advance knowledge about sleep health, circadian rhythms, and the like.

I bet you’ve never even heard of this wonderful commemoration. If you think about it carefully, or at least conspiratorially, you will see in its very suppression the ultimate evidence for my theory. The Tyranny of the Early Riser is as real as it is wicked.

Dan Perry is the former Cairo-based Middle East editor and London-based Europe/Africa editor of the Associated Press. He is the author of two books written entirely after midnight. Follow him at danperry.substack.com.

The views expressed in this article are the writer’s own.